prayer night.

so, this morning i made a decision. that decision was that although i shut my alarm off, i wasn't getting out of bed. bad choice? absolutely. i slept til about 7:30 & finally rolled out, took a shower & was on my way. i work across town so that is not fun, but especially not fun when you get stuck behind a wide load truck taking up 1 1/2 lanes so you can't get past. so, i was just a smidge late today, but it's aight.

we went to a prayer meeting last night at our church. it was one of those "highly encouraged, it would be really great if you showed up" kind of things. so, it was the church staff & spouses. i didn't really know what to expect, but i had slightly forgotten about it & was slightly more excited about going home & relaxing (if you know what i mean).

well, we got to the church & it was good to see some friends & meet the people that i always hear the names, but never have a face to put with it. this night was simply refreshing. our pastor wanted to pull all the staff together for just a couple of hours to worship, seek him & pray. the night started out kind of rocky & you could tell everything about the meeting was kind of awkward. not the awkward where there are long spouts of silence & you don't know how to react... or the awkward where someone says something & you aren't sure if you should laugh or not. it was awkward in the sense that corporate prayer & fasting is almost unheard of so no one is sure how to respond. you know? there is something seriously wrong about that. anyways, at one point in the night, our pastor had all of us take a handful of prayer cards & seek God on behalf of the requests. it was actually quite moving & i haven't been able to stop thinking about it all day.

hundreds of people fill out these little 3 x 5 post cards with requests just hoping someone will read it & their prayer will be heard. even just in the 10ish cards i had, there were multiple desperate names of family members needing salvation. and then i thought about it for a sec... i have 2 older brothers who need an 'interruption' in their lives. they need an open heart. they need to understand that the lives they are living are so empty compared to the freedom they could have. and i couldn't not seek god for those names on the card.


i made a choice last night. i will never pray for salvation for someone else without feeling the pain, anxiety, depression & fear that i feel for my brothers. ever.